speak love, do life.

Lately, speaking love, speaking life, has been on my heart a lot. Partly because of the More Love Letters movement and the ways that I've intertwined that with my life, partly because of the Baking Brigade, partly because I recently had a revelation that I need to do more to share Christ with others regardless of whether I feel that prompting from the Holy Spirit or not.

Because I have a tendency to buy food, to approach someone, only when I feel that heaviness on my chest and know that I will feel like a horrible person for the rest of the day if I don't obey.

Did you notice that? It's not first and foremost because I want to do what God tells me to do because I love Him, it's because I don't want to disappoint Him and feel guilty. So, lately I've been pondering that more. What does that--loving others because He loves me--look like in my life? What should it look like in my life?

I think it looks like helping whenever and wherever I see a need. I think it looks like not being afraid to give to someone who might not really need those bags of groceries when I could have used that money for something else because what they do and how they do it is between them and God, not me (i.e. in Pennsylvania, alcohol can only be purchased in stores that specifically sell alcohol while in Texas, alcohol is sold in grocery stores).

It looks like seeing others the way God sees them. Seeing them as His creations. Seeing them as human beings. Not judging them by whether they really need something. Because honestly, don't we all really need something? Maybe more food on the pantry shelves. Maybe more compassion for the hurting.

Basically, I've been feeling a prompting to do more to live like and for Christ every day. I feel like I'm failing Him, like I could be doing more but I let things hold me back--time, money, season of life.

Take the Baking Brigade, for example. I want to do more, I want to reach more, I want to speak to the hearts of the congregation more so they feel a stirring in their souls to get involved and support others in our military community, regardless of whether or not they share the same faith.

I want this to be about community and building up one another and creating connection and letting others know that they aren't alone in the world, that they are seen and heard and cared about. I want hope.

And I don't know how to go about doing this. And so then I wonder: Is this about what God wants or this about me? Wouldn't God make this happen if He wants it to happen? (By the way, I told God that if ever there's a month when we don't have enough baked goods for the soldiers, I'll know that that is His way of telling me that this has run its course and it's time to move on so the focus is always on Him and not me.)

But, then I also think: God will only do so much. He requires actions on my part, too. What am I supposed to do? How am I supposed to do it?

So, I suppose this is the part where I turn this over to you. How can I build up community where I am right now (because I also recently had the epiphany that the mission field, my mission field, is here) and reflect Christ more and more each day while using my God-given gifts to advance His kingdom? I need some practical advice. Or book recommendations. Or verses. Or names of people I should be looking to. Or something.