Sometimes I wish everyone were single like me—a simpler life in many ways! But celibacy is not for everyone any more than marriage is. God gives the gift of the single life to some, the gift of the married life to others. -1 Corinthians 7:7 (The Message)

Single like you, Paul? What, so you were miserable being single because you were so blunt and didn't know how to make polite conversation with a woman and wanted to take everyone down with you?

This was basically my thought on Paul's "Hey, being single is great" theory--especially as my wedding day neared. And then definitely after we said our vows, because when you're married to a husband as amazing as mine, who would ever want to be single again?

And then, my husband left, leaving me the single human being within the four walls of our home.

While I remained in the Word after Alan deployed, it wasn't until the day I poured out my heart to God because I was so upset about health problems that I really sensed that my relationship with God grew substantially. Over the past several weeks, I have begun to hunger to know Him and His word better and more than ever before. It's wonderful because I have passion and ideas. It's frustrating because I now feel stunted and uncertain of where to go or what to do next. How do I live out the stirrings God starts in my heart? (Also, another issue I struggled with was knowing whether these were God-things or me-things.)

One of the biggest challenges that I wrestled with was feeling like there wasn't enough for me at my current place of worship. (I say "for me" because there are plenty of activities and ministries, but due to my class schedule, I am unable to attend Community Connections and usually don't attend PWOC.) And lately, community has strongly been on my heart.

But, I also realized that I can't just expect the church to do things for me. For example, I had this idea that there should already be a general forum for home life group leaders to exchange ideas, concerns, and inspiration because I know that I, at the very least, could always benefit from mentoring and fellowship.

There wasn't, so I asked about it, and now maybe there will be one (I was under the impression that we had "several" home life groups because that's what the communicator/bulletin says, but it's actually only three).

For another thing, I want to improve the fellowship within my home life group. So, I created a form and know the little things about everyone--from significant dates in their lives to favorite Bible verses to topics they'd like us to study. It was eye-opening and I'm looking forward to putting their ideas to work.

Also, some of the chaplains have expressed a desire to expand the Baking Brigade. This is awesome and would be even more awesome if we had the manpower to do so. So, I took the initiative to talk with another lady who was involved in a baking outreach at her husband's last duty station and now have plenty of ideas.

Lastly, what this entire post (and basically the entirety of the last several weeks) boils down to is mentoring. I want a mentor. I need a mentor. Someone to guide me into really helping home life group flourish. Someone to share a vision for the Baking Brigade and make it happen. Someone to generally help me in my walk with Christ.

Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honors God. They must not slander others or be heavy drinkers. Instead, they should teach others what is good. These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God. -Titus 2:3-5

So, if you're older than 23 you fit the bill.

Enter PWOC (Protestant Women of the Chapel). I've only attended a few times, again because of grad school, but after talking with a friend about all that is on my heart and how discouraged I feel, she said, "You really need to come to PWOC! I think it would really help you." And I said, "I know! I just need to do my work for Tuesday earlier so I have time to go." And then she told me that one of the ladies in life group teaches a class on mentoring at PWOC.

So. Tuesday at 9. If I'm not at the chapel, someone slap my wrist and tell me to never complain again if I'm not going to take responsibility for myself.

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This post was inspired by Alan, who, after hearing me vent/reading my text messages and emails about the topic, told me to blog about it and record the ideas and changes that occur within me. Here we go.

our honeymooniversary [part 2]

Did you miss the first part of our honeymooniversary recap? It's all about our stateroom, dinner seating, eating vegan, a day at sea, Costa Maya, and Grand Cayman on the Disney Fantasy's 7-Day Western Caribbean cruise.

Costa Maya
Our second port of call was Costa Maya, which was where Alan and I had booked an excursion to the Chacchoben Mayan ruins. We originally wanted to go on the Tulum excursion (which leaves from Cozumel), which my dad had taken before, but he recommended that we try a different one.

Sadly, I did not take water and was already dehydrated, so halfway through the tour I had heat exhaustion and had to return to the bus. Alan walked me back to the bus and ended up staying with me (I told him to go finish the tour) because by the time he would have caught up with our group, it would have been over. I was disappointed, partly because I really wanted to see the ruins (the largest temple was, of course, the last one on the tour) and I also felt like we wasted money.

On the upside, I finally decided to go to the health center (which was closed the other time I went), which is where I was diagnosed, given some meds, and sent on my merry way.

Cozumel
By the fifth day, I was definitely feeling better (and kicking myself for not having gone to the doctor earlier). Cozumel was hotter than Costa Maya, but I didn't mind it at all and I didn't feel like my organs were bouncing around my body the whole time I walked.

We first tried to go to a beach, but were attacked by mosquitoes about 100 yards from the beach and turned around. I later told Alan that if I'd known the beach was that close, I would have kept walking, but then I rescinded because, let's face it--if there are 9 or 10 foreign mosquitoes trying to suck my blood and I don't have proper vaccinations, I don't care what beach is just around the corner.

Instead, we decided to walk around the town and explore beyond the usual tourist shops. While we were exploring, we found a little hole-in-the-wall place that served ceviche de pulpo. I like ceviche, but have never had Mexican ceviche or ceviche with octopus, so Alan ordered some for us.

I was leery of the open condiments that simply sat on the tables and were shared by everyone, but it was seriously the best ceviche that I've ever had in my life. And, because Alan ordered in Spanish, we were given the hotter salsa which was absolutely delicious/burned off my tongue.

Then, we found a small bakery and bought a concha and coffee. We met two locals--a Canadian ex-pat and an author. We talked with them for quite a while (the author, Vincent, is pictured below); they reminded me of the guys my dad drinks coffee with in the mornings. They told us to eat at Candela's, a seafood restaurant, and also suggested another restaurant on 50th Ave., which apparently has super-fresh fish--you pick the one you want from a cooler. Since we could see the rooftop of Candela's (the other one was a taxi ride away), we decided to eat lunch there.

At Candela's, we ordered agua de Jamaica (a hibiscus drink), a mojito, and two seafood entrees--all for about $30. The food was good, although a little bland, but I assume it was made that way because we were tourists and neither of us spoke in Spanish at the restaurant.

Back on the ship, we reclined in the hot tub on one of the top decks and enjoyed the scenery. The hot tubs are almost flush against the wall of the ship and the outer walls are clear, so you can see what's beyond the ship.

Day at Sea/Senses
For our second day at sea, we purchased two day passes for the Rainforest, an area featuring three saunas (one dry, one wet, and one dry/wet), four different showers with sounds and scents (the Caribbean rainstorm was my favorite), and access to hot tubs and warming chairs. For $16 each, it was totally worth it. The wet sauna was my favorite. It made my skin glow. And, in spite of the fact that everyone on a fully booked cruise was onboard that day, the Rainforest was pretty empty. We shared the sauna with other people only twice.

Castaway Cay
Our anniversary was spent at Disney's private island. We immediately walked to Serenity Bay, the adults-only beach, and went out into the ocean.

Naturally, I was stung by jellyfish twice. (When my family vacationed in Bermuda, I was stung by a jellyfish and nibbled on by a curious fish, which I think kind of started my ocean phobia--when I was younger, I wanted to be a marine biologist.)

Also, I found a whole sand dollar and gave it to Alan as an anniversary gift. He put it in his pocket, where I later crushed it because I was clinging to him for dear life because a shark might have been in the water/sea grass might have touched me/I might have gotten stung again/who knows what lives in the ocean.

So, I found another sand dollar that was almost whole. (It lasted the entire way to Dallas, where it was crushed by a guy who was trying to stuff his bag into the overhead compartment.)

We ate lunch at the adults-only barbeque place near the beach. Barbeque places are not the places to go when you want vegan food. After lunch, we didn't spend much time in the ocean because Alan got a really nasty sunburn (that he still needs to have checked out by the doctor and will hopefully schedule an appointment after he reads this post). So, we headed back to the ship to get ready for our anniversary dinner at Remy.

Remy
To celebrate our anniversary, I wore the dress that I wore to our rehearsal and the nail polish I wore on our wedding day (I would have worn the shoes, but Ophelia ate them). Alan wore his uniform.

The experience at Remy was wonderful and definitely closer to "the Disney difference" that I'm used to (overall, I feel like Disney really sacrificed quality for quantity this time around). The food and service were amazing; I definitely want to eat there the next time we cruise. Alas, I didn't take photos because I thought it would be rude, but the presentation was gorgeous. Remy offers two different menus (or you can pick and choose what you'd like from each); we ordered both so we could try all of the food.

Overall, our honeymooniversary was really well-suited for us--full of "adventures." I think I prefer the smaller ship experiences (Magic and Wonder) to the newer ships, but then again, I'm sure that maximum capacity and me being sick had something to do with our last experience. I'm glad that we were able to explore some new places together and enjoy a week relaxing alone, even though it was bittersweet knowing that this was the last major trip we'll take for a while.

our honeymooniversary [part 1]

We chose the 7-day itinerary that would let us celebrate our first anniversary while on the cruise. While I had cruised the 7-day Western Caribbean (Costa Maya, Grand Cayman, Cozumel, and Castaway Cay) before, the ship had skipped Costa Maya because of hurricane damage. This was Alan's first cruise.

Our Stateroom
Our stateroom had a larger verandah than normal, which was awesome. However, it was located at the aft of the ship, which meant that there was an almost constant dusting of occasional soot, which was disappointing. So, while the larger verandah was nice, I think those particular staterooms in the aft should be charged at a lower rate than what Disney currently asks.

On the upside, our stateroom was serviced by a really attentive and professional crew member. One night upon returning to our stateroom, we found two super luxurious bath robes. Another night, we received a bottle of wine (which tasted cheap, but it's the thought that counts). Another night, we received some chocolate from a guest relations crew member. (Unfortunately, her note said that she hoped we enjoyed our day at St. Maarten, and we'd spent the day at Cozumel.)

Dinner Seating
At dinner, we were seated with two other families. On the three previous Disney cruises I'd taken, we'd never been seated with other people, so I'm not sure if group seating is a Disney Dream/Fantasy thing (because these ships are much larger than the Magic and Wonder), or if it's standard for parties less than four. Either way, I was disappointed, so we asked for private seating.

The head servers graciously accommodated us (surprisingly, one of the head servers was also a main server for my family on a previous Disney cruise, so it was neat to see him work his way up--also, what are the odds of him working on the same ship on the same dinner rotation that we picked for our honeymooniversary?). We ended up eating at whatever table happened to be open that night (i.e. the usual party was dining at Remy), which was perfectly fine with us. We met some pretty cool people that way.

Eating Vegan
Sadly, on the first night of the cruise, I had acute gastroenteritis (except I didn't know that at the time). Long story short, I skipped half of dinner and later ended up ridiculously dehydrated. However, I had no idea that I was dehydrated, so the next three days were spent with me having severe pain for no apparent reason. As a precaution, I ordered vegan food (I assumed that I'd been sick because I overloaded my diet with seafood and non-vegan foods on the first day).

If you intend to sail with Disney Cruise Line and want vegan food, I suggest that you tell the staff before you set sail. Or, pre-order your food when you're on the ship--they'll make whatever you request (apparently). Because if you don't have the guts to ask for something specific and potentially inconvenience them (that'd be this lady), you'll be stuck with the vegetarian choices, minus the non-vegan ingredients.

And when you receive your portobello mushrooms in creamy parsley sauce without the creamy parsley sauce ... it's just disappointing.

Plus, I felt uncomfortable having to constantly explain veganism. However, I give Disney props for trying. Just know that many of the choices on the vegetarian menu don't comply with a vegan diet.

Vegetarian spring rolls of deliciousness

Day at Sea
Because I wasn't feeling well, we/I slept in and then went to see "Brave" in the Buena Vista Theater. Later in the cruise, we also watched "Wreck-It Ralph" there. We also spent some time in the adult area (i.e. one of the pools). As family-oriented as Disney is, I cannot express enough how well Disney pulls off creating adults-only areas. In spite of the fact that we had no children, we never felt like we had to have kids to enjoy ourselves.

We also discovered an interactive adventure in which you become detectives on one of two cases (one is easy, one is difficult). You receive a badge and walk around the ship, scanning your badge on different "paintings" onboard (most of them are located in the elevator areas) and then trying to find clues to solve your mystery. Apparently, the culprit is different almost every time, so you could play the game the entire time you're on the ship and have a different experience each time.

Ooh La La
I don't even remember what day we stopped at Ooh La La, but at some point during the beginning of our cruise, we decided to check out the night life. We settled on the French-inspired champagne bar (although I also really liked the London-inspired dance club), where I learned that I do not like champagne.

However, I loved the atmosphere in the lounge and the fact that there were so many different offerings by way of nightclubs and lounges, depending on what you wanted (atmosphere-wise and beverage-wise).

Grand Cayman
After a day at sea, we stopped at Grand Cayman. We didn't book any excursions (although I'd gone snorkling there before) and decided to walk the town. Grand Cayman is eerily reminiscent of a small English town, and there isn't much along the main road (if you walk left off of the dock; we didn't venture to the right).

We walked all the way to a beach and picked up some sand glass and took photos. The water was beautiful and warm. After we explored the beach for a while, we headed back to the ship to eat lunch onboard and relax at the pool.

Next up: heat exhaustion at Costa Maya, meeting locals in Cozumel, jellyfish stings at Castaway Cay, and the absolutely most amazing dining experience/honeymooniversary celebration at Remy!

one year reflections

You know you're connected to the military community when anything longer than two years seems like a long time to live in the same place.

For several weeks after arriving here, I felt like a guest, like this was Alan's home and I was here temporarily. It took a while for me to acclimate myself to this building, to these four walls, and the fact that this is my home. And sometimes when I'm standing at the threshold and I've just opened the front door, I still catch a whiff of the fresh this-is-my-first-time-walking-in-this-door scent (which reminds me of the this-is-freshman-year scent that the dorm used to have at the beginning and end of every school year). But regardless of the scent that greets me (fortunately, it has yet to be anything unpleasant), I no longer feel like this is just a visit--I feel like I'm home.

When I am in an airport USO around familiar haircuts and young women with baby strollers and no husbands in sight, I know and I am home.

When I am driving around post or reading in my backyard and hear mess call echoing across the way like some martial adhan, I am home.

When someone asks me how long I've been at Ft. Hood and I can no longer say, "Since the end of June," I am home.

When I water the yard and hear the announcement jingle echo from the Jeep dealership, I think of sweltering summer days and trickling rivulets that are impossibly hot and hunting for fossils like Dad and I used to do, and I am home.

When I water the yard, I am home. Because seriously, who waters grass and why are there gaping cracks in my backyard and why can't we have a basement?

When I select my ID card by feel amidst the pile of plastic in my wallet as I'm exiting the highway, I am home.

When I vacuum the carpet for the third time that day because the dogs track dirt inside but I'm happy because this is my house and I want it to be clean, I am home.

When I wait at the window for Alan's truck to pull in the driveway because he texted, "On my way home" a few minutes ago and then race three dogs to the front door because everyone wants his attention, I am home.

the one in which i'm jealous of myself

I wrote this shortly after my 23rd birthday, which was actually in March. I recently rediscovered it and had to share the awesomeness that is my loving husband.

My husband is super sweet, thoughtful, and romantic.

In case you didn't already know that.

Case in point: my 23rd birthday. We enjoyed dinner together before I went to class, but I was a little disappointed that it was rushed (he had more work to finish and I had to go to class and give a presentation). Still, we were able to be together, and that's what's important!

When I walked out of the building after class, the Jeep was parked in front of the sidewalk. There were rose petals scattered all around, a huge Hello Kitty balloon almost as tall as I am, an absolutely gorgeous vase of flowers, lots of balloons, and the most wonderful man ever.

Granted, it wasn't until I actually saw him that it sunk in that he had done everything. Up until I saw Alan, I just thought it was a weird coincidence that there was a Jeep that looked like mine (because I didn't park in front of the chapel, so it obviously can't be mine), with a huge Hello Kitty (and I was slightly jealous that someone with a Jeep had a huge Hello Kitty and flowers).

My thought process went something like:

That is a huuuge Hello Kitty! That Jeep looks like mine! Those are pretty flowers! Wow, someone is really lucky! Hey! That's my husband! Why is Alan here? What's going on? Ooooh, those are for meee! He moved the Jeep!

 

one month later

It's hard to believe it's been a whole month since Alan, Chipmunk and I started our adventure from my parents' driveway.  Our adventuring took us to an Arkansas gas station with more cockroaches than I ever want to see again in my life.  To a Wendy's at 2:30 a.m., after which Chipmunk ran around crying and carrying a chicken nugget in her mouth (at 2:30 in the morning, remembering to tear up a chicken nugget was not the first thing on my mind).  To two hotels with no vacancies.  And finally, home.

Although it didn't actually feel like "home" until we returned from visiting some of Alan's family in Oklahoma.  Up until then, I just felt like I was on vacation, but while turning on one of the last roads before the house, I realized that I was excited to finally get out of the car and just be home.

+ We are mostly unpacked--there are still a few boxes, but they're mostly office things for which I have no room.  At least they're in the office.